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Although technology certainly creates its challenges its power in creating literate and globally connected kids who learn from each other may indeed have profound outcomes that humanity will benefit from.
“Kids are curious, and they are compassionate. To generate learning, nurture empathy. Kids willingly memorize the names of the countries in Africa, but they become keenly interested when they are providing malaria nets or helping to build wells that save lives of children who become their friends. This is no longer theoretical. Students can be collectively involved in studying math and simultaneously learn to become global citizens.”
Lisa Miller, Ph.D., is Professor of Psychology and Education, Director of the Clinical Psychology Program at Columbia University, Teachers College and is Founder of the Spirituality Mind Body Institute, the first Ivy League graduate program in spirituality and psychology. Dr. Miller is a foremost scientist on spirituality across the lifespan and her innovative research has focused on quantifiable effects of spirituality in health, resilience and thriving, and an overall sacred and joyful life. Her clinical and consultation work focuses on spiritual awareness and spiritual growth, for individuals, families, groups and organizations. In The Spiritual Child, Miller presents the next big idea in psychology: the science and the power of spirituality. She explains the clear, scientific link between spirituality and health and shows how invaluable spirituality is to a child’s mental and physical health. Thank you to WatkinsBooks for this beautiful interview.
The power of story has been celebrated since the dawn of humanity. One could argue that the modern day t.v. and media has sadly taken over storytelling. But, there is still amazing books being written that have powerful impacts on our children. Here’s a book list worth exploring! Click here
What if we all lived from our heart? What would society look like? …. Lilou Mace interviews the co-founder of Heart Math, Howard Martin.
If you haven’t come across HeartMath yet, its time to delve into the modern science backing up the millennia old understandings of ancient cultures. Here HeartMath Institute Research Director discusses why heart coherence is essential in stress management and sustainable behavioural change. Enjoy!
“A forest is much more than what you see,” says ecologist Suzanne Simard. Her 30 years of research in Canadian forests have led to an astounding discovery — trees talk, often and over vast distances. Learn more about the harmonious yet complicated social lives of trees and prepare to see the natural world with new eyes.
Follow along with Deborah Rozman, Ph.D, co-author of Heart Intelligence, as she guides you through a 2-step process called the Quick Coherence Technique. This simple technique was developed by HeartMath. The HeartMath research team has demonstrated that our intuition is more accessible when we bring our heart, mind and emotions into a cooperative, balanced alignment. Science refers to this as heart coherence. Practice this HeartMath® technique to increase the communication with your heart’s intuitive intelligence and increase your inner-coherence. Learn more ways you can increase coherence in the new book, Heart Intelligence. The book provides numerous tools and techniques for accessing your intuitive inner guidance. Quick Coherence can be used to calm reactive emotions, reduce feelings of worry and fear, lessen feelings of overwhelm and stress, prepare for sleep and quiet an overactive mind.
Death introducing its self to our daughter in a beautiful heart felt way.
A graceful spirit in the form of a fruit dove lay still and angelic.
A gift of learning for our girl.
A soft and gentle way of meeting with death.
As her eyes are wide with wonder at the pretty colours this being has, she remarks quite matter of factly “Oh she’s left her body.”
We’ve decided to use that term, as for us it seems a more truthful description of what has occurred.
She held the dove and looked closely at her claws letting them close around her little fingers and chatted feverishly about the amazing array of colours.
She made her bed in a box and after awhile asked why all of the ants were coming?
I explained that Mother Earth had fed Dove with beautiful food her whole life and now it was time for her to feed mother earth with her body as she won’t be needing it now that she is returning to the worlds dream. To nourish the Earth and become part of the soil which feeds us all.
She pondered that for a while as she fussed about.
“Will we do that?” She said.
“Yep” I answered with a smile and excitement in my eyes.
I could see that was a big one.
She left it there and asked if we could bury her later.
“Sure” I replied.
This lovely Dove was the centre of her play for the rest of the day.
As I went about my day I kept seeing myself in my minds eye, spreading smoke medicine over our daughters body with this birds wings.
This is something I once did a lot but haven’t felt drawn to for many years.
So the next morning we had a simple little ceremony to tune in and thank the spirit of the bird for the gift and we created a beautiful medicine tool with her wings.
The whole process was totally natural for her. Not once did she have anything but wonder and joy in her heart.
And I know as her mother this is the unseen speaking directly to her. Beginning to teach her of all the aspects in the cycle of life. In the comings and goings of spirits.
That our teachers coming in many different forms.
In ways that she can embrace and understand. That are gentle and full of beauty.
The subtle realms speak in whispers and potency. Humbleness and reverence always.
This morning her papa and her took the body of this beautiful spirit down under the icecream bean tree that delights her with its gifts of sweetness and they returned her to the earth. She joyfully chose to sing Happy Birthday at the top of her lungs!!
And then got on with her day.
Her wings are drying in her play space beside her dolls house.
And I sit here and ponder the beauty in that. Creation and death. Side by side always. I’ve done this with all of my children. I have watched and followed deaths lead.
I have watched as they have felt brutal blows from death. Seemingly unfair and I’ve watched them time and time again call upon the early, more gentle learnings for direction, solace and grounding. To have known death intimately with their very own hands has connected them to it. It is a great mystery but not an enigma to them.
May we remember to parent along side of Mother Nature and the cycles of life.
May we remember to make time to take her lead when it is called for and have the wisdom to know when that is.
May we hear her whispers and take heed upon her direction.
May we remember that we are in fact a small part of a dream so much bigger that us and enliven this glorious, soul nourishing connection within our children.
In honour of the beautiful Fruit Dove. Our gentle teacher.
Enjoy this article? You may also like to read A Mothers Infinite Body Intelligence by Erica Angelica
I don’t know if it’s universal or whether it’s the result of 4 kids, one house and many agendas, but trying to cook breakfast and keep a toddler joyous in the morning whilst the other parent squeezes in a half hour meditation has been a pretty complicated task in our home.
There are 6 breakfasts to cook with different bread requirements, cups of tea to brew, blenders going, pans sizzling and a budget exhaust fan drowning out the sweet song of the birds. Then there is a hungry toddler asking questions from afar which sound like a muffled flute. Questions like can we go get ice cream or why is that stone there or something else ridiculously hilariously ludicrously cute. And I always want the response to be a considered one, which amongst the toast pop and kettle whistle can be challenging!
To maintain a calm peaceful presence amongst all that is quite the job!! Why doesn’t everyone make their own breakfast does cross my mind but when we try that it’s like a game of gridiron in a toilet cubicle…. one person cooking results in less injury and only one frustrated human not many.
Thankfully I figured out a neat little plan a couple weeks back that literally gives us the 20 minutes we need to get the majority of breakfast prepared and cooking. We may need to pause a moment or two to cut string or sticky tape a drawn gorilla head onto a paddle pop stick, but other than that our toddler is happily entertained by the night before creations and the exploration and play they entice.
The creations you ask? Well, what I decided to do was create little worlds whilst our toddler is getting put to bed so that when she arises in the morning she comes out to new scenes, new worlds, new activities to do. This morning there were puppy’s having a tea party with a pirate, a cave with a sandpit and squirrels in it, a jump over pillow trampoline set-up and a few other oddities.
Tomorrow she might find the tea party table transformed into a musical instrument station and the cave moved inside and now a stamping station set up with paper, ink and stamps. New scenes to explore and entice her into engagement.
So some of these scenes last 3 minutes, some last 30 seconds and some last a whole 15 minutes or more. But more often than not breakfast is ready and she is still playing away in her own imaginative little world amongst the last night’s creations.
I’ve actually found joy in creating the stations now. Setting up cute little treasures along the way, putting colored water in the teapot, making simple little changes which excite her and when I visualize her little face I am finding it excites me too! Double win and beats just cleaning up after toddler tornado. This still gets done but use to be all that happened in those going to sleep time moments. Cleaning up has actually become a creative and fun daily adventure.
As we’ve taken this path of cleaning up/ preparing for play the little cutey is clearly joyous even at the sight of the scenes.
“Oh look! Everything’s amazing!” Has been voiced numerous times, alongside “oooooooooh” and “yaaay!” Any of those little expressions have made my heart smile and assisted her mind to drop into the imaginative realm and start creating. Ooh yeh, I like it!
How long will this last? I’m not really sure. For now I’m set in doing it after seeing the joyous rewards for her and the calm relaxed space we get to cook breakfast in each and every morning now.
This might be common sense to many or maybe this inspires you dear reader. Either way I hope you are also able to drink the joy of your little folk through little-planned worlds and activities that they can dive their imagination into. Learning through play and nurturing their exploratory mind. Aho!
Wildness could be seen as endangered these days.
We, as a culture have become so civilised, so deeply separated from the wilderness, that the call within us has becoming but a whisper.
We are warned as children against dangers of the wild and reminded of the importance of staying “safe”.
We are congratulated for our conforming and chastised for our challenging.
We are cautioned against straying off the path and given accolades for perfecting the well-trodden ways.
But what are the effects on our truest selves? The parts of us that we are born with. The deeply intuitive, strongly connected and profoundly wise soul that yearns to be expressed here in the 3D.
Can we explore and exhibit the unique gifts we arrive here on earth within the current culture?
I say yes. I say as parents it is a rebellious act to enliven and nurture the wildness within our children and ourselves.
To quite literally take them off the well-trodden path into the mysteries and the power that awaits us in the untamed nature.
To allow the wilderness to challenge them to step or leap beyond their comfort zone. To see a child’s face navigating this moment is truly, a most wondrous soul touching sight.
To feed their body a healthy dose of food that has grown wild to remind it of its truth. It nourishes not only their body but their soul.
It is a defiant stance against the domesticated human to acknowledge the unseen as you pass through the forest. To feel inter-dimensionally as you journey along creek beds in silence except the chattering and giggles of children. To speak your gratefulness to the waters, the rocks and the trees. To open heartedly observe the animals in their wild state and allow it to permeate your being, for children feel this. They are watching you watch and feel the great mystery.
And in their own unique way they will watch and feel too.
And they will know this dance. This deeply fulfilling dance with something so much bigger than themselves with a love so intense it bring tears.
They will know this.
It will be a vital part of who they are. Embedded in their being.
Connection to country.
Connection to our Mother Earth.
Connection to the unseen.
Connection to family
Connection to our intuitive self. Connection to love.
This voice will whisper to them in their most challenging, darkest moments and it will sing to them, inviting them back home to themselves.
The wildness in us is our greatest ally.
Our greatest gift.
Our deepest truth.
My play with our toddler at the moment consists of several repeated imaginative scenarios.
Some options this last week have included;
~ We are visiting the shops (with me as the car or bus driver), we are buying bits and pieces and picking people up on the way.
~ We are going on adventures to the circus where we can jump, swing and sing songs.
~ We are making cakes or cupcakes, baking them, sharing them with people / dolls – and finding them absolutely delicious ofcourse!
Now, no matter how much I try and stay present with the imaginative play, often my mind jumps to what I shall make for dinner, and I miss a crucial piece of information. This then has my 3-year-old toddler looking at me with wide eyes and a look of disdain.
“Oh sorry sorry! I missed that” I say. She informs me again about what is happening, where my doll is meant to go or say and then looks at me again with wide eyes as if saying “Got it?!?”
I just nod my head as if I am responding to a high school teacher who caught me drawing funny pictures instead of listening to a lesson at hand.
So I get it correct this time and do my best to watch on as she moves and mumbles, then bumbles away then back again. I associate it to being in really thick fog whilst driving and trying your best to see the road and stay on track. You sort of know where it is but it’s also hard to see and grasp what’s 15m ahead. You know that feeling – extreme concentration needed!
The scenario of our play sometimes repeats, but in my reflection it changes more than repeating. New people enter the bus, sometimes people we don’t know, we go to different shops and buy different things. Sometimes she is late for circus and I’m meant to start while she waits outside the bedroom. When ‘the class’ has started she makes her entrance with her baby strapped to her – late and proud. Hilarious! It’s ever changing. It’s ever evolving.
Creating inner worlds and managing the external world
So while she creates worlds and bosses me (her external environment) around within her world, I get yelled at (when she’s tired), I get hugged, I get looked at with joy and also frustration (when I tune out for 3 seconds) and I ask myself what is actually happening here?
I recently read this quote by Joesph Chilton Pearce which summed it up beautifully for me “All children want to do is play in worlds they create and project on their external world. If allowed to do that, they are constantly building new neural structures for creating internal worlds and projecting them on their external world. And they build up an enormous self-esteem and feeling of power over the external world through their own capacities.”.
I am constantly trying to remember this! This control over the external world that is part of her play I need to remember is actually wonderful – although hard to digest at times with the looks of disdain from a cute as little 3 year old!
The gift of the safe space to explore
I see this as a far-reaching gift really – a gift for this little spark of beauty. Being able to be present with her play, bossed around within her imaginative internal world and being there to create that safe space of exploration through my simple presence.
That’s all she is really asking for right? For me (or any of us) to be there so she can feel safe to push the boundaries of her internal worlds. To create new ways inside her mind so when she is faced with a similar scenario in her next 80-90 years of life she may already have the solution, or at least the flexibility to find one. These fleeting moments of imaginative play are powerful future-shapers in a world of magic and madness, beauty and mayhem.
May these moments support her to forever thrive.
A searing pain that is left unspoken but strongly felt in the hearts and wombs of The Mother, night walking in the deep recesses of her being.
This culture of ours offers scraps to the Mother whose child is wandering off into the abyss. Wandering off into the realms of shadows. Wandering into the palms of those who would not have their best interests at heart.
Our culture turns a blind eye to such things pretending that this existed anywhere but here. She is left only with the desperate prayer upon her heart.
This culture offers limited time to the grieving mother who cannot hold her dear child close to heart. Who cannot stroke the hair of her most beloved creation while they drift off to sleep for they have drifted beyond this world into the unseen. Beyond her touch.
And as the pain sears into her heart every waking moment she is offered limited time to voice this grief. This unspeakable pain. For after a while it is uncomfortable to those unfamiliar with the terrain of grief. Of whole bodied yearning for what one cannot have. And this culture speaks not of such things and she is left with the desperate prayer upon her heart.
This culture offers condescending chit-chat to the mothers whose journey into the underworld of birth has left her scared. As she struggles through trauma unspoken she is left alone flailing to comprehend what just happened. Her body is screaming to be heard and yet she is met with words opposite in nature. This culture tells her she is lucky to have a baby at all.
Journeys into the underworlds
And so she stuffs these overwhelming emotions down into the pit of her gut and carries on. She loses a part of herself. She is smashed into a million pieces but culture does not speak of such things. Only of glowing and happy new mothers and so, she is left in the wee hours of the night with only a prayer upon her heart.
This culture offers nothing to the mother who can only mother part-time. As though when the calendar clicks over her heart somehow closes. It cares not of how her heart aches when she watches her beloved children parented in a way completely different to her heart’s yearnings by others. It speaks to her of fairness and while her head understands her heart doesn’t not. She yearns to hold them close. The pain can be searing and she is left with a helpless prayer upon her heart.
Darkness of her conditioning
This culture offers judgement of the mother battling with the darkness of her conditioning. When the trauma of her own past takes her over and she acts from this place, guilt and regret become her constant companion. She craves compassion and knowledge so she may crawl out of this hole but she must search far and wide for this. She is left with a hopeful prayer upon her heart.
The path less travelled
This culture offers shame to those mothers daring to walk the path less traveled. As she takes uncertain steps toward creating a new story for her children she can be met with feverish stories laced in fear about what happens when one
There is a darkness in the collective Mother. A searing pain felt by us all. The journey into the underworld is taken in differing forms by each and every one of us. We walk this journey and very sobering
And just when the pain feels so searing, the discomfort so intense, we think be cannot stand it, we
We must continue anyway. Head held high. In spite of all that is happening, we must find it within ourselves to push through and rebirth ourselves over and over again.
How utterly amazing we are.
This is wisdom.
May we take just a moment to bow down at the feet of this wisdom…
Of these women.
And see, see the truth of what lies within a mother who takes this journey seriously.
Who courageously learns from the underworld.
Who feels into the depths of her pain and allows
Who no longer yearns to be the maiden but has expanded and expanded herself to embody what it truly means to be “The Mother.”
She has alchemized her pain into wisdom.
Just as our Mother Earth does.
These are the women who ought to be making decisions on our children’s education, on the health care of our youth, and all else that shapes our children.
Alongside great men who’ve had the courage to do the same.
This is the future I long to see.
Where the darkness is not only valued and supported.
But spoken about.
Where the feminine is remembered and honored in all her shades from the lightness to the dark and back again.
May all mothers remember and value the power of the alchemist inside her.
As we walk, she gives me gifts and it reminds me of the magic that surrounds me and ensures my meditation comes in many glorious forms.
Walking through the forest I imagine all small children’s attention can be caught by the bite-size pieces of natural exquisiteness. Intrigued they pick them up and may share them with those who are walking along side. Simple and natural beauty and a presence of what is right there in front of them. A truly soulful place of being.
This was my recent experience.
So as we walked, and my mind did the loop to loop, my daughter would stop every now and again and hand me a little piece of nature. A bright red petal of a flowering tree first, then a palm berry, and then a clipping of a wattle that we just passed.
Staying connected and present through play
“Presents for you papa” she would say as she handed them over. The first one went straight through my mind with little consideration. Not
What I often find when I spend time in her presence is that she truly does require my presence and what a glorious exercise that is. Painting, pretending to be a shop owner,
So where I’m getting too is the first three years of parenthood has made meditating sitting on a cushion with my eyes closed more challenging than it use to be. Tiredness, busyness
Meditation can come in many forms right?
But in moments like this when my daughter bought me back to the present through her
I’m grateful for those moments. I can only speak for myself but I’m sure many parents find it a juggle to cook, clean, work, exercise and also connect with your little teachers. Meditation is about presence right – with your breath, with your movements and thankfully with the
I remind myself it will be gone in the future soon, she’ll be off with her friends or something of that nature, so
Paul and I made a pact that we would alternate giving each other some time in the mornings to meditate/ stretch/ be creative / plan or whatever we feel we need now that our babe is getting older.
I decided I would do meditations and whenever I went down the internet wouldn’t work or something would make that difficult so one day I just closed my eyes and started to go through the different parts of my body and verbally check in with it. To love it up or ask why it is hurting.
I had no expectations but I was so amazed to find out how profound it was!!
It was as though my body said “Ahhhh finally!! ” and poured its heart out to me through feelings, images and words.
To say I’ve expected my body to perform well beyond its capacity in the last few years is a major understatement!
A lot of tears were shed and a new respect for the intelligence of my body is now realised.
So I wanted to share with you want unfolded this particular day as an example. I closed my eyes and began to allow myself to relax. I kind of speak to my body as though it’s another being.
So what I was saying was like ” it’s safe now to relax. You’ve got time and space to let go and talk to me. I’m here and I’m listening etc”
Once I had relaxed I tuned into the parts of me that were in pain.
I began with my lower back. Breathing into it and giving it complete presence.
It could feel it relax and then I asked why it is tense. Images came in my mind of me rushing around busy only tending to the never-ending list of the outside world and the feeling in my lower back intensified.
Then the words “More presence needed”
So I realised that to begin understanding the pain in my back more presence is needed in everything I do.
Yep, great got it. Mum of four! Homeschooling! No surprises there!
Next, I went to my upper chest.
My lungs and chest have been really suffering from experiencing huge grief in my life of last year but this felt different so I tuned in to it and spoke kindly letting it know I was here and listening.
Suddenly my mind was filled with images that move my very soul.
Women. Oracles. Witches. Seers. Priestesses. Plant women.
My heart ached.
It ached for a time when that was me. When visions and rituals were my life. When I was so entwined with the unseen, the earth and stars that I was neither here or there.
I was in betwixt.
When the plants spoke to us all and we listened!
When the air was static with so much magic that all the worlds merged and blended.
My heart knows that life.
It yearns for that life.
Here I am.
Mother of four in a very different world indeed to that of my heart.
Don’t get me wrong there is plenty of magic but it can feel clunky at times. It’s a journey to get there in this chaotic reality of a Mum.
Our women are very much getting restless with our current culture.
But still, I found myself sobbing. Feeling so far away from the visions of my heart and soul.
And then a beautiful vision made its way into my being. The one below.
At first, I saw these women in paintings that do something to me when I gaze upon them. They move me in unexplainable ways.
And then slowly emerged the infinity symbol being drawn with these women in one side.
On the other side was the word Motherhood.
And it kept being drawn from one to the other, one to the other, until I began to understand.
These women are us. They are what we once were, still are and will be, yet in a different form.
We mastered these ways in the mountains, caves, and caverns. On our own and in sacred groups.
We were burned, strangled and killed.
And now we return. In a new way.
We return as The Mother.
And so, is it a possibility to weave the wisdom gleaned from these lives gone by into modern life as a Mother?
Because you see, as I see it, our culture seems to see mothers in two ways.
Either dull and boring or a maiden who happens to have children.
What if I owned both the Magic Woman inside me and The mother I am and they became one.
This sat so nicely with me. This feels like my truth. This is the Visionary Mother I have been writing about and dreaming of. The tears began to settle and my heart felt more at ease. My chest more relaxed.
A lot made more sense and I went on to have a most beautiful day.
All from simply talking to myself.
No wonder it has been made strange or an insane thing to do by those that would like us to remain asleep.
For our bodies remember.
Our bodies know the truth.
Our bodies are powerful.
Our bodies speak to us.
May we remember who we truly are and what we are here to do.
May we take heed and listen to the intelligence of our bodies once more.
Yay! We got our midisprout and have had our plants playing music! Can’t wait to share this with the little folk. Interested to see it? You can watch it here now!
Join us at Renew Fest, May 18-20 in Mullumbimby. We are proudly presenting as part of the Humanity Renewal POD. Get your tickets online at www.renewfest.org.au or if you live locally to the Byron Shire Santos Organics has discounted tickets for locals.
The last 20 years of science has revealed a very powerful truth for the health of our youth. By ensuring one key inherent relationship is maintained we establish the strongest preventive against our society’s most common adolescent health challenges and maximize the opportunity for lifelong thriving.
This 30 minute workshop will share key facts, powerful insights, and some helpful tools to utilize with our children and youth.
It really struck me strongly when a few years back I heard Llewellyn Vaughan-Lee speak about how bringing ritual back into our culture will create a greater, stronger and more real connection with the spirit of our earth. For ourselves and our youth. A connection that will naturally inspire us to take better care of her and look at the true majesticness she shares with us…….. and this has inspired our seasonal sharings here in Mullumbimby at Mullumbimby Community Gardens every 6 weeks.
Erica and I love sharing these intention filled, powerful, fun and playful rituals with the youth (& their parents) of our community. We get inspired by taking wisdom from old traditions, incorporating some circus play, alongside plant spirit wisdom (and a healthy dose of magic!) and give parents and their youth an opportunity to share, connect and play together. Something that assists in building stronger connections and relationships for our families and our community.
We do so as we hope this empowers our youth to carry these understanding of what lies beyond this 3D reality into their daily life. And also carry the wisdom shared into their life forever more!
Empower our youth
We wish to empower them to hold strong the beautiful connection they have with nature – as children do -, allowing them to recognise, listen and respond to the earth’s callings….and their own inner callings too. Allowing them to be true to themselves and the fire inside their heart, looking beyond the limitations society or culture may weave into their world – allowing them to be exactly who their heart desires – and to encourage them to use the hidden and powerful magic of plants, intention, ritual and spirituality to assist them on their path.
Our youth truly are powerful little magicians and we love encouraging them to recognise this! Please join us community, we love sharing this stuff and we hope you enjoy experiencing it with us! Tickets available online.
No I’m not pregnant
This is the home of my babies.
The cauldron in which they grew
The round curve that speaks of my visits between the realms to grow and collect my children. Some of them made it earthside. Some did not.
This belly that moves when I walk speaks of ecstasy and pain.
It is my guru. Teaching me to love beyond my culturalisation.
Asking me to look beyond the praise I was raised with.
The idolisation of the “perfect body.” I mean what even is that??
It speaks of motherhood.
The stage in which our culture would prefer I would not have visual signs of.
A culture that would congratulate me feverishly if I lost my belly quickly after giving birth so that I went back to how I was.
That I looked more like the maiden I was.
And I’ve done this.
A few times.
And this time I didn’t.
I sat with her.
This soft jelly like glorious tummy.
I sat with the hate I felt.
I listened to the horrific words that went through my thoughts. I really listened. Wow! They were mean. Really mean.
Confusing at times because I can never recall thinking these cruel thoughts about other women?
I sat with them noticing that they actually were not my thoughts but what I was taught to think by culture.
And slowly very slowly they got quieter.
As I reminded myself of the powerful beautiful being I am. That I am a creator. That life has formed within me. That this roundness was the place where the feminine resides.
That being a mother was an absolute gift.
Suddenly those words thoughts and feels lost their sting.
I saw them for what they were. Brainwashing by a culture that makes billions of dollars off me wanting to be a maiden my whole life. Period!
Why should I want to hide my place of glory.
Why would the man I love not revere the womb in which his child came from.
Unless he were under that same delusion. It’s been a journey of me being really honest with myself. An experiment of sorts. It’s been about embracing the calling of the “mother” for me.
About embracing change and difference. That throughout my journey in life I will look different a million times. The seasons and cycles of life flow through me. I am them and they are me.
Sometimes those mean thought come back and I feel that sting. I love them away.
Motherhood is a sacred journey and she should never be asked to hide herself.
May she express herself how she will through me and may I remember to give her the reverence she deserves.
Start your day with 12 minutes of mummas morning medicine. Centre, empower, connect and acknowledge the deep power we mumma’s hold. Expand your understanding of what it is to be a mumma. Shared with love for the mumma’s of the world.
Frederick Leboyer, author of ‘Birth Without Violence’ died recently at the beautiful age of 98. This post is entirely inspired by his wonderful gift to the world written in the 1970’s.
When Erica and I spoke about getting pregnant there were some very misperceived perceptions I had about birth. The movies I had seen throughout my childhood and 20’s made it out to be a terrifyingly painful, almost violent experience for the mother and the baby. Was this really what it had to be?
With Erica’s guidance I was handed Frederick Leboyer’s book ‘Birth Without Violence.’ It’s not a long book, actually it’s quite short but it was definitely one of, if not the most influential book I read about birth.
‘Birth Without Violence’ was the first book to express that babies are born complete human beings with the ability to experience a full range of emotions. First published in 1974, it revolutionized the way we perceive the process of birth, urging us to consider the birth from the infant’s point of view. So powerful to do so and continues to challenge the current industrialised birthing system that has become our societies norm.
“Why must a child emerge from the quiet darkness of the womb into a blaze of blinding light and loud voices? Why must an infant take its first breath in terror, hanging upside down as its vulnerable spine is jerked straight? Why must the infant be separated from its mother after spending nine months inside her nourishing body?” Wow, so many questions were raised. So many new concepts to consider for this soon to be father!
This book definitely put my views of birth into a new light. How did I want our baby to enter the world? What did I want her first experiences to be? They are very powerful questions and ones that we as parents have full control of (in most cases). I totally took a step back and put myself in my baby’s shoes and by-gosh did I want it to be very different from the movies I had seen and my initial understanding about birth.
For any father wishing to take a deeper look at birth options for their incoming child, I would highly recommend reading this book. It is definitely part of the reason why, i can 100% confirm that myself and Erica gave our little human a most warm, beautiful and non-confronting entry into this big wild and often misunderstood world.
You can purchase the book here:
I wanted to share the inner child journey I took at Renew fest this year led by the amazing Robin Grille. I didn’t share on the day as I had to sit with it for a bit. Or maybe I was avoiding because I got “busy” after that and ended up with really intense hayfever, something I had a lot as a child and not as an adult. Interesting.
We were asked to choose a recurring situation that comes up between you and one of your children that you would like more understanding on.
So I chose one with my eldest.
He is choosing ways of living that are not necessarily how I would like to see him live. They are ways of life I have chosen against. Not massive, just enough to press my buttons and have reoccurring conversations and some arguments about. It brings up strong feelings in me. And I often find myself thinking about it during the night.
We were asked to feel into it. To name it and the emotions and that come with it.
I felt annoyed, angry powerless and afraid ( actually really afraid). I felt so unheard by him.
What was our self talk?
Mine fluctuated from “after all I’ve done! After all I’ve given him. I raised him to be smarter than this. I gave him a strong set of morals and now THIS is how he chooses to spend his time.” And ” Oh god I’m a bad mother and person to not be able to accept him for who he is”
Round and round it goes with slight variations just to liven things up.
Robin then asks “Is this familiar?
Where did you learn this?”
BAM!!! There I was as a child. Early primary school age.
I see many situations. Me crying my eyes out desperately wishing the adults around me would understand that school just wasn’t for me. That I just didn’t feel understood there on any level. That what they were teaching had NO relevance to the life I was here to live.
The things that interested me where NOT discussed at school by anyone. Not the kids or the adults. I wanted to research, talk and daydream about other planets, inter dimensional beings, the Loch Ness monster ( yep I was obsessed) And feelings. Why did nobody discuss feelings? I felt like I was in a bad dream for years. I wanted to learn and hear about these things because they were my world. That’s what I knew and wanted to know more about it.
My mum was a single mum and pretty damn cool I must say. She was definitely challenging the status quo back then. So I liked hanging with her. Reading her books. Shirley McClain ect ( yep I adored “Out on a Limb” at 10 years old.) and all the parenting books she had I devoured.
So it was nobody in particular that made me feel so completely powerless and infuriated that nobody could hear my inner screams. It was the culture and the times that I had chosen to be born into.
I felt afraid and anxious a lot of the time that I was going to mess up because NOTHING came naturally that I would be praised for at school. I knew it would definitely not be safe to express my true self as a few times I did, like when some kids saw me hiding in the library reading a book on UFOs, let’s just say It wasn’t pretty.
I eventually worked out how to fit in. But it came at a cost because it required I abandon my true self. And by the time I was 15 I had severe depression that was diagnosed as a hereditary chemical imbalance ( absolute bullshit) and “fixed” with drugs. While the drugs stopped my suicidal thoughts they did nothing to address the actual reason I was depressed in the first place.
Woooaaahhh I hadn’t thought about all that stuff for years.
And the feelings were so fresh!
I felt pretty emotional.
I was sure I’d left all of that behind me a long time ago?!!!
There were a few other steps like what I wished someone had done for me and a few others which were so amazing and healing.
But the clencher for me was “How can I translate that into my life now?
How does it apply to now?”
All of a sudden I could see what was happening on so many levels. Firstly my child was giving me the opportunity to heal these feelings by pressing on that spot in me. By choosing to be different. By choosing to unashamedly express who he is! By speaking out when I suggest otherwise!
That was really freaking me out. I wanted to shut him up. I wanted to protect him but from what? It was my own unresolved pain that was hidden away with in me.
I could see the correlation so strongly.
I was also able to see how as an adult this has weirdly, for better or worse, become my driving force that is only becoming stronger and stronger.
To protect and in fact celebrate children’s inner worlds. Their unique gifts fascinate me.
It’s time for me to process and release the pain so that Instead of reacting to my own unresolved feelings when he speaks, I may truly hear him and understand that he is trying to express himself. That I can respect his choices even when they differ from mine. And if I forget and I do react I know what’s happening and I can communicate an apology that comes from a place of truth.
The upside! The reason, if there’s such a thing, is that I have an unwavering passion for giving youth that don’t fit in to the existing systems and paradigms a different choice. To give the parents of these kids an understanding to what their kids might be feeling to inspire respect of all youth as equals. To introduce the idea that we are born amazing not bad. That we are born encoded with gifts to be discovered and nurtured and we the adults,are to protect and honour those gifts. Because a world where we are all living our true purpose in joy would be a very different world indeed.
I learn so much from my children about myself.
Robin Grille is exceptional. His inner child journey is simple, clear and powerful.
I’m always so amazed, no matter how many times it happens, that somehow as crazy as it sounds my children are my teachers. Like truly!!
Life is a mirror and they are mirroring what is within us and sometimes ( or a lot) we may miss the gift in that.
But on that Saturday morning I didn’t miss it. I got it!!!! Loud and clear. And even though I made myself sick avoiding facing that part of me, when I finally did I see how absolutely beautiful and gifted that little girl was. How wise she was and how she is me and Now I walk a little taller.
Deep gratitude to Robin Grille and that little girl who has waited ever so patiently to be be heard and respected. I hear you.
Now lets do what we came here to do.
And the motherwort , the mother of mothers begins to hear the call inward.
As the autumn mornings begin to weave her soft magic across the land she begins to let herself begin to rest. She has nourished and given , standing strong and mighty.
It is time now to let go. To rest. To gather the knowledge that can only be gathered from the deep dark void.
Because she travels with the cycles she knows and trusts that she will return from her journey reborn with much to share.
She whispers to me to remember this. To know as a woman there is a time to shine. A time to die. A time to journey and a time to be reborn over and over and over again.
Don’t be fooled by societies obsession with youth and achievement she says. For the true raw magic, the time you will feel most alive is in the dying…… I bloody love motherwort!
So we went to see Xiuhtezcalt Martinez from Earth Guardians the other night. He is a 16yr old Aztec hip hop singer/ speaker on the cutting edge of youth activism.
I’m not like the worlds biggest hip hop fan as you can imagine. But poetry yes. So I’m watching him weave his magik as he does and I could feel this familiar feeling from a long forgotten part of myself.
I felt a bit emotional. So I closed my eyes and tuned into the energy of the room specifically the music and the youth dancing. And wow!!! Bam!!! That energy!!!
Can you remember it?!!!
That absolutely powerful all encompassing energy teenagers have when they gather. It is strong. Really STRONG!! An untapped energy source perhaps. And it was being led my Xiuhtezcalt who is about coming together to create a world the we CHOOSE. Not what we are GIven. But what we wish to create.
He reminded us that great things start small. To invest our time doing creative projects that lead us to the world we want. He is a powerhouse. A elder in a teenage body. It’s s beautiful thing.
Tuning in i remembered feeling that but being told I was childish. When we grow up life is hard. That I just didn’t understand yet. Well bullshit!!! I hope he spreads his message far and wide.
I hope teenagers ( and adults ) use this energy they are blessed with to create new worlds. To bravely stare down the old. Let’s support our #luminousyouth to express themselves fully and unabashedly !!! Your born with your gifts inside you like a seed.
If you haven’t allowed them to bloom. NOW IS THE TIME!!! And #nextgeneration tune in now!!!
Don’t get sucked in to the system. You are beautiful and powerful. Allow your gifts to blossom. #luminousyouth are backing you all the way!!!
I can’t remember another time in my life when I was slapped in the face. I didn’t really know it would happen now when I had my first child when we decided that co-sleeping would be part of our night-time adventures! For sure a warm welcome into fatherhood! But dammit, I loved it. It has become my favourite way to wake up. My almost 1 year old daughter slapping me in the face – who would have thought! Part of our conscious parenting experience that I am very grateful for!
Welcome to fatherhood and welcome to co-sleeping
The bed moves a little and then tap tap with her open palm on my cheek! I open my eyes and there she is. Wide eyed and big smiled beaming out of her heart. “It’s another day papa! Another beautiful day!”
What better way to start my day. The inherent joy of being alive being beamed straight at me from my daughter! Wooohooo!!
Co-sleeping was a new concept to me when I met Erica. I guess I had always assumed there was a babies room, with babies stuff and a cot. That’s what I had always seen so I thought that’s what was done. But thankfully that all changed. When I met Erica her children were still co-sleeping at the ages of 6 and 8.
When I became part of the family, the kids peacefully shuffled over to the other side of Erica. In a few years they had their own beds and then a few years on one decided she wanted her own room. Off she went and occupied her designated space by choice. The youngest decided that when our baby came along, he too would be better off in his own bed and own room. And so it was. Choices were made, orders were unnecessary.
Creating a new conscious parenting story for my life
Our baby has slept with us for 346 days today and I am so grateful for it. She has not had to cry it out abandoned in another room. She has not had to feel these intense feelings. I thought ‘crying it out’ was an experience that came with fatherhood. Thankfully this was only a story.
A massive smile and tapping and chattering straight after is often how I get woken up these days. I start my day with a ‘Wow, how friggin lucky I am” with the love being expressed warming my heart. The words are still mumbo jumbo and that itself is damn cute in itself!
If you have thought about co-sleeping as an option, you could look at the huge amount of benefits for the child as well. But this little post is all about my selfish joys of being woken up with the best welcome a father could ever have.
Want to know more?
“Families are like quilts. Lives pieced together, stitched with smiles and tears, coloured with memories and bound by love” ~ Maxine Meiklejohn
I saw my 11 yr old daughter looking at our tree with such pride in her eyes. I to, love our crazy, funny christmas tree. Its a metaphor for our family life. A perfect reflection of our imperfection. To someone else it may look chaotic. As though someone has gotten the bag of decorations and thrown it at the tree. (which in actual fact. is a palm frond and the decorations were carefully placed!) To others it may look unmatching and a conglomeration of different themes mashed together. There is Christmas stuff, religious suff, native american stuff, a pirate, decadent glass love hearts, faeries, recycled stuff, new stuff and just random unrelated stuff like a hand knitted Lama finger puppet. Every single one of them has a past, a story, a meaning.
So yes it truly is a perfect representation of our family. Of our unorganised, messy haired, unshoed, clothes stained in mud, loving, expressive, unpredicatable and super fun family. Of life. Of a home where children (and adults) are free to create their own life.
Sometimes our life does feel like this tree looks. Its can feel chaotic and unmatching and way too many things being crammed into one house. BUT it also feels alive! It feels as though its ever evolving into something completely different. There is learning going on left right and centre as well as debates, things being lost, cartwheels through the lounge room, paper planes above your head and giggles fill all of the corners. Its definitely NOT linear, or neat.
Some of the time I haven’t a clue what they are learning. I have to tap right in to deep wells of trust that all is unfolding perfectly. Some of the time it is as clear as day that they are learning things that blow my mind!!! Other times they are still. I’m learning to trust the breaks. That we all need to pause.
In this culture linear neatness is congratulated. But Im going with our Christmas tree, which in itself is hilarious because I don’t really even celebrate christmas. I much prefer summer solstice. Even so I am going to celebrate the art of allowing, the art of individuality, the art of finding peace in the chaos, the art of appreciating things as they are and not trying to change or manipulate them to our own preference and most of all I am going to celebrate the art of LOVE! In all its imperfection and unpredictability.
I think that is just what the world needs right now….more messy christmas trees!
Our founder, Erica will be on BayFM with Sally Cusack at 11am this Friday on the Pregnancy Birth and Beyond show; talking all things plants, birth and post birth care.
She will also be revealing some very exciting secrets about what Luminous Youth has been plotting away at for 2017!!!
Tune in and get up to date with the Byron Shire’s new-wave learning space launching the Luminous Village in 2017.
I wrote this blog long ago….
I’m not sure why i didn’t post it. Maybe the timing wasn’t quite right.
But I just read it and I felt like it was just what I needed to hear!!!
So these words and the emotion behind them are a gift from my heart to yours. May you see how intrinsically important and powerful our job as guardians of the next generation is!!!! May it be inspiration for all you parents and your respective journey’s!
Warmest and heartfelt blessings to you all – enjoy the blog here
People often ask me what it is like to have a baby at 42 years old, 9 years after my last, my eldest being 14 years old.
“I feel like its a luxury actually” I answer.
I get some strange looks as its not the response they expect.
I read this post below by my beautiful friend Vinny Skulldali Shanti and it sums up why I feel like that.
I KNOW that each and every moment is to be cherished even the crappy hard ones. I KNOW how fast they grow up and spread their wings. I look across the room and see the proof! I can fully appreciate every cuddle i get. I treasure carrying her all day and snuggling up at night. I KNOW that many “professionals” tell you that this will spoil them IT DOESNT!!!!! IT DOESNT!!!! Treasure these little babes because they are just passing through.
My heart felt every word of Vinnys. She is a beautiful mumma and all round amazing funny loving human…Thanks for the reminder Vinny!!!!
From Vinny Skulidali Shanti:
“Don’t ever fool yourself completely that your children are yours to keep. Hold them close whilst they are small and love them deeply always. Breathe them in and appreciate their impact upon your being…and be prepared that their physical proximity to you is temporary….and when at the airport, smile, joke and tell stories to distract you both from the imminent leaving. Only once they are safely thru the departures gate and airside, may you sob your big, salty tears from your mouth and nose, snotting strange, clear, teary snot onto the clinically shiny floor, giving zero fucks about your appearance and not even wondering where you’ve been storing this volumous face-water until now. Stay there with your audience of uncomfortable onlookers for as long as it takes to dry out enough to drive yourself home. Then go on with your world with your heart ripped out. That’s your job. Do it well.
” You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable” ~ Kahil Gilbran
A wise plantain plant woke me in the middle of the night once to remind me that we really are what we eat.
“Quite literally ” she told me “when you eat a lot of me you become part plantain and take on aspects of me”.
I knew it was her due to something that occurred earlier that day.
I liken this to everything I ate and began to eat more and more wild food or weeds or gifts from Mother Earth, whatever you want to call it.
Less “tame” food and more “wild” food affected my intuitive self in a big way. I found the land and animals communicating very clearly with me as my energy wasn’t so foreign. I was more “a part” of this ecosystem. Many answers and visions came to me during that time that are coming to fruition now.
This is how I choose to do “plant medicine”.
It’s slower for sure. It’s more subtle yes. It’s nourishing and some of these guys do taste funny. But the connection is deep and profound. Any age can be a part of this ceremonial way of living and eating. I’ve had a little time away from this way of life. Moving and re-establishing my life. But I’ve been connecting again with my wise weedy friends and the visions are flowing and my heart is filling. The wild me has returned!!!
The wise women tradition is the oldest tradition on earth. It defies race, age and social status. The wise women work is invisible and powerful beyond measure. It is that of the creator and destroyer and everything in between. It is simple and heart centred work.
While her work is invisible it was once revered in times of harmony with our earth. In times before the written HIStory we learned at school, her powerful work kept us abundant and intelligent (not to be mistaken for intellectual).
But through HIStory she was hidden and shamed. A legacy that continues in our currant times.
Let us dig deep and remember the ways of the wise ones. It still lives in our bones and our blood.
In the important invisible work we do with plants, lovingly guiding our children, weaving words into the earth, cooking spells of Heath into our family meals and all of the many other things we do that our modern culture has tricked us into thinking are of no value. How clever and cunning they were to fool us out of our magik.
May we remember and may we have the courage to once again weave the invisible work of the wise woman into our lives. We are powerful mamas!!’ Artist: Unknown
This book has come up so much in my world lately so I’ve taken it as a sign I need to go back (it’s been about 8 yrs since I read it) and revisit “Raising our Children Raising Ourselves” by Naomi Aldort.
Having a new babe and being a bit sleep deprived has taken me a little off my parenting coarse at times and my heart is already smiling reading chapter one.
“If we want the future of humanity to look different to how it looks now, we need to allow our children to create it out of who they are, and not out of who we want them to be. Parenting is a path of maturation and growth if we dare to learn more and teach less. When you have the courage to stop defending the way you are, or the way your parents raised you, you can open up to the possibility that you are much greater and more magnificent and capable than you thought you were.” ~ Naomi Aldort
Naomi you touch me and remind me how to be the person I want to be. There is a great Luminous Youth interview too if anyone want to get the vibe but the book really does hit the spot!
The importance of unstructured creative imaginative play in nature is massively undervalued in our culture. A culture that praises busyness, unemotional adult behaviour, technology and outward achievements.
Remember getting totally into the zone as a kid where a whole other world was your friend. Where anything goes and epic ideas flow.
As a mumma when I hear my children chatting or singing away to themselves and can see them totally in their own world I do everything I can to protect that bubble. For inside that bubble is wisdom beyond measure. It’s a direct doorway to the other realms. The same place some of the best inventions, music, art and creations of our time have come from. It’s the same place us adults search so hard to find in ourselves and when, and if, we do allow ourselves to drop in we promise ourselves we must visit there more often.
If I had a wish it would be that all children were allowed to play here often. Everyday in fact!! That we were never encouraged to abandoned ourselves for the outer world.
FOR THIS IS THE ONLY PLACE TRUE LEARNING SPRINGS FORTH!
It takes many dimensions to raise a child.
So mummas and papas don’t forget to slowdown and check in with your team. Your not alone on this journey. You have full support and backing from the unseen realms to bring all your child needs right into their sphere.
Trust the whispers. (as crazy as they sound!)
Trust your heart.
And most importantly trust your child.
Can you spy the very little cute hand helping mine make tahini treats??
Yes, baby wearing is hard work but it’s benefits are massive!!
Movement is the main stimulus needed to create new peaceful neural pathways. Babies feel content and included in the “tribe” and learning is happening from the minute they are conceived NOT when they start formal education.
Babies are absolutely present, taking in all the smells, textures, visions, sounds, conversations and more than we know. Being a part of our everyday life in the forest with this wise little human brings us so much joy.
This little lady loved helping her brother cook afternoon tea rather than put aside to play with toys made of plastic. Lots of laughs and mess!!
The ancient wisdom of our children will only be heard by those with the intelligence to listen. It’s a slow dance and requires a more presence than merely listening to words. Slowing down to create space and opening the heart wide to feel and sense the purity of their souls, the lifetimes of lessons and the fierce love they are here to teach us.
Holy shit, that was a serious ride. I’ll get back to the lead up to the birth at another time but right now I want to just cut to the real deal. The real deal of birth. Of evolution. Of life. Of one human coming out of another human – right in front of your eyes. Yes, indeed, holy shit! A seriously amazing, beautiful, raw, incredibly gob-smacking adventure into the desire that lies within the human soul to continue it’s wild and whacky journey on this beautiful ever-giving planet.
This experience is certainly like no other and not one to be treated with anything but upmost respect, honour and appreciation. To my wife, Erica and all you mothers out there, past, present and future, hats off to you. You are powerful. You are mighty. You are a vessel of subsistence. The vessels of love that carries humanity onwards. Thank you, I love you.
So Erica tugged on my arm at 11:30pm with a gasping call of “it’s happening” and there I was. Having been asleep from her suggested “good idea” since 9pm, the force of nature was now in full swing. The sounding of mother earth harmonising out of Erica and into the stillness of our bedroom was like nothing else I had experienced. Loud. Primal. Powerful. The sounding of true, raw and honest human force. More beautiful than a sacred gong, more powerful that an oceans thunderous roar, and more piercing to every atom in the atmosphere that shook and resonated as she sung this primal resonance through her body and out into the universe.
At one point the sound became more of a scream, but only for a split second, when Erica said “No..” and returned the sounding back to the base of her spine, getting out of her head and back to what would benefit every women in labour, so I understand.
Erica was not to be silent, she was not to feel shy or nervous in her environment, she was not to worry whether anyone else could hear her or not. No, she was free. Free to do whatever was necessary to bring this human head out of the opening between her legs – how that actually happens still to this day, I am gobsmacked.
We consciously chose to have a home-birth, to ensure that Erica felt safe within her environment. I learnt through some talks I watched that if a birthing mother does not feel safe, her brain does not excrete with ease the necessary chemicals of which include oxytocin (the hormone of love), endorphins (hormones of pleasure and transcendence), and prolactin (the mothering hormone) that make the birthing continue at its necessary pace. In fact if the women does not feel safe, and her mind is fearful there is a chain of biological events in the body that prepare the body for flight and direct the muscles to freeze, or flee, which is definitely not want you want when a human head is trying to emerge out of a uterus. So my wife, not being a fan of hospitals chose to feel safe and sound at our home in the forest.
How did I feel about this home birth idea?
Shit scared to start, but we often fear what we don’t understand so I had to take some quiet contemplation to understand where this fear came from. I read some books, watch some birthing video’s and learnt what I should have learnt many many years ago. After all is birth not the most magnificent and amazing thing a human can do. Think about it, what have we created on this earth that even nearly compares to what a women’s body builds when she is developing another human form inside of her. Nothing even comes close. One human, creating another human inside their body without any thought whatsoever. Holy shit – its a miracle. It’s an absolutely astounding miracle that the woman’s body knows how to do this. And we think the brain is clever – get real – the body is where it is at. The body is way more intelligent than the brain – I’m working on this everyday to stop my mind thinking it is all so wonderful and trying to once again understand the communication of my body and my heart. After all, science now tells us the hearts electromagnetic impulses are much stronger than the brains… so heart heart dear heart, how do I use you!
So what did I discover?
I discovered that I was led to believe that birthing is unsafe. I was led to believe that “medical professionals” are needed. I was led to believe that a women did not know how to birth and therefore she needed a doctor there to ensure she was doing everything right. I was led to believe that Erica and I should hand over our power. However this was all to be proven completely incorrect.
When I watched the pregnancy process unravel what I witnessed was a support network of women who believed in Erica’s ability to birth our baby come forth and connect with her. I witnessed “women’s business” conversations, massages, meditations, bodywork, books and sharings that to me were completely foreign and I didn’t even know existed. Like the information of a secret rites of passage passed down from generation to generation by words and action rather than textbooks and testing. I mean women’s bodies create a brain, heart, lungs, arms, legs, complex vein systems and the list goes on – couldn’t a women’s body that has been fed love by her partner, fed support from those who’ve had this experience and fed the inherent millennial stored cellular wisdom of being a women, bring a baby earth side without a hospital setting?
When I thought about it deeply, yes I could feel safe and have trust that we could birth our baby at home, and so our decision was made.
So why do we fear birth so much?
Even that my brain couldn’t figure that out and I had to get out of my head and into my heart throughout this process, ensuring I kept the faith that her body knew exactly what to do. Holy shit it was scary, but her body did it. It birthed a human. A baby girl at 4:46am on January 6, 2016 at home.
We welcomed this little being into our arms. I sung her a song that I made up early in the pregnancy and sung throughout the pregnancy, and she looked intently into my eyes and just listened. My heart reached further around the earth than it ever had before and Erica’s energy flew higher than the clouds in the sky.
We lay in our bed for the next four hours, until we fell asleep, as rays of life from the glorious sunshine peeped past the edges of the blinds, arms wrapped around this new creature who was still residing within the fine realms of life in matter and life in spirit. Soaking in an energy of pure stillness and calm, of awe and beauty, of astonishment and happiness, just soaking in the most amazing experience that had become part of my life.
I felt a strong urge to ground her on this earth on day 2 or 3 i think it was, so I placed her bare little scrunchy feet on the dirt outside our back patio. I thought this earth that provides so much for us could, and would, also like to welcome her to her bosom of interconnected life. I must admit however I did go outside and get some of mother earth’s soil on day one and place it like the Indian culture do with bindi’s – smack bang in the middle of her third eye. Why so – i’m not too sure, it just felt like the right thing to do, and you gotta go with feelings when they are motivated by love and connection right?
So, this earth now had a new lover, a new carer, a new companion to create ripples of love out into the atmosphere with, and what a joy it was to see this first feet to earth connection for a proud new papa.
As the day passed and the one after that, and the one after that too, I repeatedly said to Erica how grateful I was that we chose to birth at home. We didn’t have to leave the house, we didn’t have to get in a car, we didn’t have to sign anything, or be told what the medical profession says should happen next. No, we could just soak in the magic of birth, in our home for as long as we desired.
This new human was to only experience a place of calm connected love for her first days and weeks in this world of many faces. There was no trauma, no stress, no crying for in fact weeks. She only experienced being wrapped in a cocoon of love within our own house and our own welcoming arms.
For this, I am forever grateful. The impact this initial welcoming had for this new human and her neurological brain structure will never be known, but I’m positive it could not be any more love filled and peaceful.
Our Creative Director, Paul Crebar was interviewed by Sally Cusack on Bay FM just recently talking about what he expects fatherhood to be like.
We rarely get to hear the father’s side of the story and Paul brings an open and honest perspective on the challenges he expects, the unknowns he questions and a bit about his vision of how he wishes to play his new role as a father.
To listen click here.
This is definitely one of our favourite TED talks by Principal Peter Hutton. If you want to see a child thrive this is definitely a step in the right direction.
This is the show Erica was invited to be a part of created by Lainie Liberti. “I learned heaps too!” Erica states. “But what would you expect sharing the panel with Robin Grille and Michelle E Barone.” Grab a cuppa and enjoy!
Please, please remember your worth.
feel into your heart,
and tap into the truth of just how powerful your job is as a game changer at this time in history.Can you feel it?Ooooohhh they have been so clever to down play the role of raising our youth.
But the youth are waking us up!
In the womb they whisper to our hearts,
As toddlers they stand strong in what they need,
As children their love is unbridled,
In the schools they rebel.Let us, the adults, just stop our overly busy “important” lives for just one moment, this moment, and feeeeel into what is happening here. What is being asked of us?We are the change makers being called to honour and assist the evolution of humanity.
This IS our mission.The names mum, dad, step-parent, grandparent, teacher, carer are playing down the truth.
If we could consciously birth our babies in peace,
If we could raise them in love with nature and all living things,
If we could support their natural unfolding and trust that their passions are messages from source itself,
If we could model courage and fearlessness,
If we could love them when our conditioning tells us they deserve it least,
If we could transparently and sincerely apologise when we mess up,
If we could laugh with them every day,
and most importantly if we could give all of this to ourselves,
Can you imagine the tidal wave of change that would wash over this planet?Can you begin to see just how important you are?
What a true activist you are?
Can you begin to imagine how much backing you have in the unseen worlds?I know how tired you get,
how busy you are,
how much you doubt yourself,
how hard you try with no thanks and zero recognition,
I see the tears you shed,
the frustration that wells up inside you,
your yearnings that go unfulfilled and unnoticed.But please, please know this,
your are deeply deeply appreciated,
you are backed 111% to create change,
You are “seen”
you are so so important,
and you have in your power the ability to create human beings that have not walked this earth for a long time.
When you are weary dear change maker take a moment to breath in the abundant energy that flows to us from the stars, the earth, the trees & plants, the water, the animals and know without a shadow of a doubt that your work as a conscious parent or carer of our next generation is some of the most important work on this planet and you are backed and loved more than you could ever imagine for a very simple reason…..IT IS TIME!
image by francehart
“There is a dance that only you know how to do.”
Do you remember your dance?
Or were you told it was wrong, perhaps a little too wild?
Did you spend your childhood cultivating, refining, laughing, playing with and getting to know your dance? Or were you too busy memorising the dances other told you were the “right” ones to learn?
When thinking of your dance, does it ignite something within you? Does it make your eyes ablaze with passion? Do you want to ACT just to bring this to the physical plain?
Or do you look for those feelings in others, perhaps on TV? Getting a slight hit of their passion, but deep down wishing you could create your own?
I wonder how many of us feel these things?
How many of us in our heart of hearts don’t intimately know ourselves and have stopped believing in the precious and unique dance living inside ourselves? My guess is most of us.
Why? How can we change that? How can we remember?
Heres how I see Planet Earth.
Imagine a beautiful, delicate tapestry that is ever evolving, wanting to keep recreating itself into a more and more beautiful existence. That each and every form on Earth is a thread of this. All perfect, unique and individual and together they create the whole image. It is important that each thread is different so they bring their part of the image to life.
Imagine if they all looked the same?
Each thread plays an important part of creating beauty…… and balance.
Can you see where I am going with this?
Today as a society we fill to the brim (from a heartbreakingly early age) our childrens’ lives with institutions and situations to teach them how to be. We have forgotten the very fundamental foundation of being human…that each and every last one of us is encoded with an important gift to the world. It is our magic. It is our medicine. It is what brings us alive! It is our responsibility to bring it to the physical realms from our dreams. To cultivate it, seek out facilitators and mentors to guide and inspire us and to always do the same for others seeking your wisdom. To pull your weight. To BE what you are here to be!
THIS I believe should be what any form of learning is based upon. BRINGING OUT WHAT IS WITHIN.
We are taught from the beginning that what is within is not important, wrong or something to be ashamed of. Shame is what keeps so many adults locked into a life that lacks vital force, vibrancy and doesn’t fully reflect our inner most gifts. It is no mystery really as to why this is….
We are told as children: when to eat, what to eat, where to play, when to play, if or if not what we choose to play is safe, when to be creative, how to write, what to read, a history that isn’t relevant to us and isn’t entirely true, whether we are good at something (even though we didn’t request an opinion), whether we are good enough to continue (regardless of whether we enjoy it or not), when to sleep, when to wake, what to wear, how to wear our hair, to wear shoes, to be afraid, to have “good” manners, that the “wild” woods are unsafe, not to run on cement, to not get dirty, to be “good”, bla bla blaaaa the list goes on!!!
What part of any of that reflects or nurtures our individuality? What part of any of that teaches us that we can trust ourselves?
“TRUST CHILDREN. Nothing could be more simple or more difficult. Difficult because to trust children we must first trust ourselves, and most of us were taught as children that we could not be trusted.” ~ John Holt
Each day there are so many opportunities to encourage our children’s inner trust. Feed a baby when she is hungry, instead of on a schedule. Trust his instincts when he wants to sleep with you and not in a dark room on his own. Facilitate your child’s own interests and passions. Be the one who says “Go for it!” If they want to wear board-shorts on a cold day, let them. We can have no idea how they feel or what the underlying reason is. Only hindsight grants us that wisdom.
Let them form their own deep relationship with mother nature, the very essence and material they are made of. Let them make mistakes. And where possible start this when they are young, when you are around to silently hold space for them to correct themselves. Even more importantly, notice what goes on inside yourself as you allow your child to learn naturally. Hear the inner voices but don’t react from them.
This is where the “spiritual journey of the parent” really kicks in!
Notice what comes up for YOU and own it.
I wonder how often we ask children to alter what they are choosing so that WE feel more comfortable, when instead we could simply sit with our discomfort and be the learner rather than the governor of someone else’s ability to choose? In the end the whole idea that children are the “learners” and that adults “know” seems preposterous!! This deeply engrained belief is the cornerstone of self doubt in many of us, and then slowly but surely our own dance fades away.
BUT……It never ever dies completely!!!!!
Please, please, parents and adults of the world remember your dance!
The Earth is waiting!!!
Find the courage to live it….little step by little step. Each step enlivens you and brings your gifts into the physical tapestry of life.
Each child who sees you living your passions courageously, despite your fears will do the same. When they watch you ACT from your heart in the face of adversity, they will do the same. When they watch you feel into your hardships, release, cry and then transmute them, they will do the same. When they see you laugh loudly, dance wildly and act from integrity, they will do the same.
And my god, can you imagine what a world we could create!!!
With every fibre of my being I feel like these kids are here to show us the way forward. To break the existing belief patterns on what it is to “learn”. Human consciousness IS evolving. It would be wise for us to listen to what these children have to say.
Jacob Barnett asks us to STOP LEARNING, START THINKING and then CREATE!!! He also asks us to think differently about Autism. In this article there is a story on him as well as a TED talk by Jacob himself. Both are excellent and although he seems a radical genius I believe the underlying message applies to us all!! CHANGE is coming through our YOUTH!!! Exciting!!
Go to article by clicking here
“Too often we teach that it is more important to be able to spell & label correctly than it is to actually have an experience with the thing itself. It doesnt matter how you spell “happiness” if you dont EXPERIENCE it!!” ~Simon Paul Harrison
And “seed” and “garden” and “Love” for that matter!!
Im super excited to be chatting with Alice Moffett tomorrow morning on her radio show celebrating Nature Play week and the importance of having Mother Nature as a direct teacher and playmate.
Listen to tomorrows interview at 9am on
Cant put into words how much I love Robin Grilles work!! (He’s happens to be a pretty dam beautiful human also!! )This is such an important point in our transition back into natural attachment parenting of the next generation so we can help this planet by creating luminous youth. If you haven’t seen his work please check it out. It is beyond inspiring.
Ive been wanting to blog for so long but have been enjoying a really outward phase of Luminous Youth……now that I’m creating life in my womb and feeling more inward writing feels like a nourishing way to create and share my experiences raising Luminous Youth!!! Sending love and warm blessings out to each and every one of you….let me know what you think!!!!
This is a subject particularly close to my heart. Children who do not fit into any of the existing systems. Discussing with with one of the worlds leading experts in this field whom happens to be the warmest, most open, hilarious and loving woman was such a pleasure. Thank you Mary Rodwell!
Play reflects life experiences.
When it is FREE and UNSTRUCTURED it can naturally be used as a way of processing life events that have been found challenging. A way of gaining back power. They are profoundly wiser than we realise. They know!!! They self heal!!
Thank you my amazing children for reminding me of this. I am humbled and inspired!!!
I really resonate with the work of Inelia Benz and particularly this article!! Growing up i found grammar extremely frustrating as it would take me out of my creative flow and made me self conscious of any mistakes I might make. I never feel the need to correct my children, or anyone for that matter, as when i am reading someone else’s words I am FEELING behind them for what their heart is trying to express to me. So dots and correct spelling mean very little when we come from that place. More freedom and creativity in our written expression I say!!!
For a great read click here.
Im sure your all feeling the energies of this Mercury Retrograde and all of the other amazing things that are going on in the stars above that seem to make us feel a little crazy but are ultimately for us to grow and learn.
One of the themes i have been seeing is that its TRUTH time. Masks off!!! Not that we are always hide our secrets on purpose but sometimes there are parts of ourselves that we have hidden so well out of protection and fear of being different.
So the timing of this offering could not be more perfect for me!
I have always had such a strong connection to our galactic family and learned early on that this was not something that was accepted or celebrated by most of society and so i learned to close that part of myself. While it served me well to look “normal” it was not beneficial AT ALL to my wellbeing. I have taken a long time to reopen this part of myself so that I can thrive.I love and relish with such joy when i see MANY children coming through with this connection intact and strong.
This is for them.
This is for us all.
May we open our minds (and hearts) and overcome our fears to listen to the children whose wisdom will lead us forward.
Warmest Blessings Luminous Family xxxooo
New moon Blessings!!!!
I think I missed some over Solstice period so I have two offerings this New moon to make up for it!!!!
This first is with the wonderful Marion Rose. She has written for many different publications including “Kindred” magazine and has inspired and helped us to understand the journey of parenthood or caring for others children as a deeply transformative spiritual opportunity.
Marion also has some online workshops very soon.
Check out the links under video for more info.
Enjoy and share far and wide!!!